Oh, the Choices we Make

One of my best memories of college is my speech class. My final speech had to be a persuasive speech, and that it was. It was about choices and how we each had to make those choices for ourselves, based on what we thought and felt was best for our families.  The ladies in class loved my example about how it was not just Eve's fault that we were in the mess that we were in.  If only Adam had chosen to just say no to that tempting bite of apple, the world might have turned out differently.  ;) 

At the root of my speech was that we had to look around us with open eyes and hearts, come to an informed decision, and follow through with the choices that we made. It was the idea that we were (and are) all responsible for ourselves and our outcomes. I loved that speech and it solidified an A in the class. To this day, I still believe that about our choices. Sometimes I have done great with my choices and sometimes I make mistakes. Today I vow to start making more choices that will positively affect change in my life and in the lives around me. Here goes:

Me - I will set goals that are achievable. One on my biggest challenges is that I love large scale projects.  If I coordinate meals for a family who is grieving a lost one, I automatically start to think about establishing a network of food sharing across the community. If I coordinate an event at my children's school, I want to make it the biggest and best event possible, even though I do not have the volunteer power to do it. So, I challenge myself, to be realistic in my goal setting so that I have more down time to spend with my family.

Children - Since I will have so much more time available due to my realistic expectations, I will be able to work with them on setting their goals. They are 15 and 12 so they should be thinking about what outcomes they want for their lives. Don't get me wrong, we have discussed this many times before. But, we don't have it written out on paper - something tangible for them to refer to. I have learned over the years, that it is so important to get things in writing. Nothing compares to having a visual reminder of what your goals are. It can be something as simple as a spiral notebook that you write your goals in. As you achieve them, check them off.  As you think of more goals, add them.  If you have one main goal, tape it to the wall. If you want to make it pretty, frame it. If you don't have a frame, make a paper frame or tear the edges of the paper to make it look artsy and tape that up. Whatever you need to do so that you see your goal and love your goal, do it. That is what I will be working on for my boys and myself.

Marriage - I will schedule a date night every other week. See how my realistic goals just kicked in. I originally wrote every week, but then realized that goal was definitely setting me up for failure. We are always so busy with our children's activities that we just can't make that commitment right now. In a few months that should change. So, for now, it's every other week.  By March, it will be every week.  And hey, if I think of swim meets, football and hockey games as potential date locations, then I can pretend that we have date night much more frequently.  Wait...stop right there!  That's a joke, when I say date night, I mean date night with just my fantastic husband. I want an occasional dinner out with just the two of us, and nice long walks around the lake in the evening, walking hand in hand and staring into each other's eyes, and it should be after the lights go on to illuminate the bridge over the lake, sparkling on the water, and rippling on the waves.  (Harlequin romace, here I come. lol.)

Health - I am completely outing my self as being a bit overweight here.  Oh the trauma.  Fine, I am over it.  After all, anyone who sees me can see that there is plenty of me to love.  A part of that is due to some injuries that I have had from playing hockey and, truth be told, some injuries are from walking on flat ground.  Let's just say that I have never been known for my graceful ballerina-like movements.  Today I vow to do my physical therapy exercises more frequently, get into the pool at least 2 times a week and lift weights twice a week as well.  See, realistic expectations.  The pool will start as soon as my bronchitis clears up.  I will do the rest starting today.  I think that I am going to consider any workouts my hubby and I do together as date nights.  I am gong to think out of the box for a bit.  I still want my dinner and walk though...

Home & Environment - I will also continue my journey to eliminate chemicals in my home and the environment.  What made me decide on this journey was for me to really start reading the labels of some of the cleaners that I was using. It kicked me in the pants and made me decide that I was not willing to risk my family's health. In part it was me being selfish. I want to be around for a really long time and I want that time to be healthy. I want to be the Grandma (Bueli and Bacia, as the boys call my Mom and Joe's Mom) who is healthy and energetic enough to play tennis, go on bike rides, do a mini triathalon with everyone, and clown around with my Grand Children. (sidebar - I know that those relationship titles are not technically capitalized, but I have always chosen to capitalize them because I believe that the relationships are so important to me, that they deserve a capital letter.)  I believe that if I slowly cut out the toxins in our home and environment, that I will be that Bueli down the road.  I already switched to microfiber cleaning and cut out window and stove/oven cleaner.  The bottle of bleach that I have is about 2 years old as well, and still pretty full.

There are so many studies that show the negative affects of chemicals - from burns, to repiratory issues, to cancer links.  It just makes sense to continue on that journey.  I know, some of you are saying - well there is no conclusive proof that chemical X leads to cancer.   I say, you may be right, but there are so many studies that show a potential correlation between chemicals and illnesses.  We even have a national chemical poisoning hotline because there are so many toxic products on the market.  Here is the number in case you don't have it programmed in your phone yet. 800-222-1212.  Using less chemicals just makes sense to me.  I am sure that I am not the only person out there who used to do what I like to call the "Spray and Run".  My sinuses, throaght and eyes used to get so irritated when using cleaning products that I sprayed and ran, hoping that the chemicals in the air would disperse so that I could breathe.  I even almost bought one of those fancy chemical masks.  I encourage you to take a few minutes to take a look at the labels on your cleaning products and your personal care products such as shampoo and moisturizer.  Researh why "gentle" shampoo for babies is "gentle".  I read somewhere that in one product it was because of an added chemical that desnsitized the baby.  Oh...so the shampoo isn't really gentle, it just has an extra chemical to dull the senses that makes us think it is...?  How long does that piece of furniture really have to stay wet with the chemicals on those cleaning wipes and spays for it to actually be sanitized?  I can't imagine that many of us keep them wet for even just 5 minutes, let alone the length of time the products indicate.  How does that affect germ resistance?  Yes, I am the mother who refuses to send the antibacterial wipes to school.  I choose to not contribute to the problem.  Let's just clean the tables with water and a cloth.  If my kids get sick once a year from germs that they picked up at school, so be it.  It will just make their immune system stronger.  I like to think of my immune system as a muscle.  The more I make it work, the stronger it gets.  I know it is not the case for all illnesses, but I think that is a safer bet for me than using all of those toic chemicals.  Again, it is all about choices.  So, please take a look at labels, look online for the Material Safety Data Sheets (MSDSs) for the products in your home, even for products that are supposed to be "green", and take a look at the Environmental Working Group's "Hall of Shame" that talks about cleaning products.

I could go on and on, but I'll stop here.  My next post will include some info about some alternatives to harsh chemicals in personal care and cleaning.  I am fortunate to have joined a great company as an independent consultant, which is also what prompted me to start doing my research on chemicals.  I get to meet some fantastic people while hosting presentations and showcasing fantastic products that you can use to save time and money, all while eliminating a majority of the toxic chemicals in your home.  For me, a job can't get any better than that!  We all know that I love speaking in front of a group, see the paragraph above about my speech class.  I hope that everyone reads the next post, but I am separating it so that you can easily choose to skip it if you want.  No pressure from me to read what you are not interested in after all.

Go enjoy your day and think about your goals!