Yes....I AM that girl.

On Friday I went to lunch with a new coworker.  I had a great time eating some fantastic Asian food and chatting about his path to his current position.  During the conversation the idea that I love to talk came up.  He was a perfect gentleman and said yes, he had noticed that.  LOL

At some point the conversation came around to me being "that girl".  Yes, I am her. 

Our conversation really made me think about what it really means to me to be That Girl - here are a few things that I came up with...

1. I am the girl who does not understand why EVERYONE can't just be nice to everyone else,
2. I am the girl who gets sad when bad things happen,
3. The one who says a prayer when I hear sirens,
4. Who sees a piece of trash on the ground and picks it up (unless it is a wet tissue outside a bathroom (lol),
5. I'm the girl who believes in working hard for what I have, because I am not just entitled to it because I exist,
6. I believe that spending time with my children is more important than watching my favorite show on tv,
7. I'm the girl who wishes she could have the body of a pro athlete, but whose body is riddled with injuries,
8. I'm the girl who grew up wanting to be an at home mom and was lucky enough to do it,
9. I am the girl who originally wanted 8 children, but am grateful for my two wonderful boys who are a gift from God (my body could not handle any more),
10. I am the girl who has a husband who has taken care of me through all of my injuries and still wants to be with me forever, and
11. I am the girl who (if I were about 8 inches taller and 80 pounds lighter) and had done the pageant circuit, would have answered that oh-so-famous question with "World Peace". 

I know that some people make fun of the contestants who answer the question that way, but I never have and never will.  Some people think that it is the easy answer, but I don't.  World peace is so incredibly complex and all encompassing.  Just close your eyes and imagine it.  Really, do it now so you don't forget......................................................There would be no hunger, no discrimination, no domestic violence, no hatred, no pollution, no bad things happening to good people.  We would all look forward to long, healthy and happy lives for ourselves and our children.  Life would be interesting and safe and lived without fear.  So the next time you are on stage and someone asks you what your wish is - bravely answer "world peace".  And remember, the whole world a stage!

Sharing - Johnson & Johnson Removing Toxic Chemicals from Products | Healthy Child Healthy World

Johnson & Johnson Removing Toxic Chemicals from Products | Healthy Child Healthy World

Interesting article showing how just because it says "gentle or free and clear" on the label, does not mean that it is.  So happy that there is much more awareness of this type of problem and that people are lobbying for change and transparency. 

Back to the Basics - A Very Good Thing

Home made chicken soup loaded with onions, carrots, garlic, cilantro, a dash of salt and my home made red tomato hot salsa + lemon, mint, ginger tea + lots of fluids = a cure for bronchitis/whooping cough?  Oh, I forgot to mention vapor rub slathered all over my chest, back, and feet.  Then as soon as my soup is done cooking, I am going to sit in my bedroom with the humidifier set at full blast and the door closed.  Long gone are my days of sitting with my head over a pot of hot water with a towel over my head to keep the steam in.  Technology is wonderful!

Today I decided to get back to the basics, the old school way of healing.  I have been sick since last Monday, we are talking 10 days of headache, body aches, congestion, cough, sore throat, difficulty breathing, no decent sleep, major disruption to my family schedule and responsibilities, and the stress of possibly not getting a pay check in a week since I have almost no leave from being out of work for so long with my ankle and shoulder surgeries.  Oh, and I will probably have gained a few pounds when it is all said and done since I have hardly moved my body since this all started.  I have been eating a little less, so there is hope.  It has been one heck of a ride with antibiotics, an inhaler, prescription cough meds with codeine, and steroids to make all the meds work better.  Basically, I have been poisoning myself with medication to make myself better.  So, I decided to do some research on my symptoms to see which foods can possibly cure me.  Those listed above are what I found.  I decided to take myself off of the prescription cough meds and switch to a decongestant.  I hope to have come up with the perfect combination of power foods and meds to finally kick this sickness out of my life.  *Now, I am not a doctor, so do not take my plan of action and say that I told you to do it and make yourself worse if you have some kind of crazy illness.  :)

At this point, you may be asking - why blog about being sick?  Well, thank you for asking, I would love to tell you!  I truly believe that we can find good things in everything that we do and in everything that happens to us, IF we choose to see those good things.  For instance - no, I have not been able to move much and I have been feeling miserable, but that means that I have been able to start this blog that I have been wanting to start for a while.  After all, I can only watch so much tv before I feel like my brain is turning to mush.  I have also been able to go through tons of emails in an attempt to clear out my numerous accounts - the accounts that I give out for: emails that I actually want to receive; the one for stuff that I sign up for that requires an email address, but I really don't want to receive the marketing; my very first email account that I have not been able to let go of even though I rarely use it; my other email address that I originally set up for spam mail and then later decided to change, but that I can't get rid of now because it is my full name and I might need it one day; and my business email addresses.  I have three of those (I just set up my blog email).  I always keep up with immediate needs, but I have some old training and marketing emails that I need to clean up. 

I have also had A LOT of time to think about what I want to do when I "grow up."  For some reason, I have not been able to make that decision yet.  Now I know why, or maybe I should say that I accept the why, since I have known it for a while.  I have been afraid to truly admit what I want and afraid of failing at it if I try to do it.  But, I finally decided that not trying is worse than failure.  It is failure mixed with fear and regrets which make up this sludgy stew that catches you in it and does not want to let you go.  I won't divulge everything right now, but let's just say, that I love public speaking, reading, writing and health/environmental causes.   :) 

Ultimately, without this illness, I truly believe that I would not have finally made my decision so soon.  My decision to go get it all.  Don't get me wrong, I love what I do at my day job, but a girl needs to have some great extra curricular activities that she can be committed to and truly love doing.  So, fear, get out of my way so that I can carve my path in life before I kick the bucket.  If I end up being a fantastic success at what I attempt, I am definitely going to retire from that day job before I turn 80.  LOL.

So Bronchitis/Whooping Cough - Thanks!

On Autopilot and Intentionality

First of all, I apologize for this post not being about the product information that I mentioned in my previous post.  I have a friend who recently was feeling a bit under appreciated, so I chose to dedicate this post to her.  Here is to you Michelle.  I appreciate all that you do.  ;)

I think that we sometimes go through life on auto pilot.  It is partially a result of us having so many things to do, not only for ourselves, but also for our children, extended family, and our jobs.  With so many things to do and thoughts swirling around in our brains, we sometimes can't help the autopilot mode. 

Have you ever been working on your computer, watching television, or reading a book to have your children tell you that they have been talking to you and you just did not hear them?  Have you ever been out on the town and had a friend message you later that they saw you and called your name, but you did not hear them?  How about this one - have you ever missed your turn off from the expressway because you were so deep in thought that you did not notice it coming up?  Thank you to everyone who chooses to go to the next exit instead of crossing three lanes of speeding traffic just so that you don't miss your exit.  Imagine what accidents could happen if everyone acted like the wild driver I saw the other day.  Please spread the word - It is not worth it.  Just go to the next exit and take that extra driving time to refocus your thinking. 

I think that these things happening to us are partially caused by autopilot syndrome and "over-stimulation" of our brains, which can lead to stress.  And we all know that stress does "interesting" things to our bodies, both inside and out.  One of the most visible examples of people who shows signs of stress are  the Presidents.  I sometimes ask myself if the white house buys stock in two innovative product lines - grey-hair coloring kits and wrinkle producing creams.  If you have a few extra minutes, check out the following link to an article about stress.  Stress Article

So what does all this have to do with my under appreciated friend Michelle?  Well, I think that autopilot mode sometimes causes us to not take time to realize the importance that people have in our lives, and in turn we don''t have enough time to focus on the good things in life and take them all in.  We need to start doing that and start telling people how they improve our lives.  I know, not everyone is great to us, but hey, some people are and if we start to really focus on goodness, and expressing goodness ourselves, then the best that can happen should - positive changes all around us.  We can choose to focus on the person at work who refuses to say hello when you greet them, or the person who lets their dog use the bathroom on your lawn without having a bag on hand to pick up the evidence.  (Yes, this happened to me once.  I happened to go outside as it was happening and saw that she did not have a bag.  I politely said, "Oh, I see your baby needed to go, I will run and get you a bag for that."  And I did, and she picked up the poop.  I chose to keep it light and funny, and I think that is why she was happy to comply.  If I had given her a dirty look and yelled at her, she probably would have just stalked off and left me to clean up her mess. 

Today is the day that I will start thinking more about shutting off the autopilot function in my brain and turning on the Intentionality Function instead. I will be intentional in my actions which will lead to greater productivity, greater awareness of those around me, and greater expression of my appreciation. Not that I am admitting that this has ever happened to me, never ever ever...most of the things above were just random examples.  ;)

Oh, the Choices we Make

One of my best memories of college is my speech class. My final speech had to be a persuasive speech, and that it was. It was about choices and how we each had to make those choices for ourselves, based on what we thought and felt was best for our families.  The ladies in class loved my example about how it was not just Eve's fault that we were in the mess that we were in.  If only Adam had chosen to just say no to that tempting bite of apple, the world might have turned out differently.  ;) 

At the root of my speech was that we had to look around us with open eyes and hearts, come to an informed decision, and follow through with the choices that we made. It was the idea that we were (and are) all responsible for ourselves and our outcomes. I loved that speech and it solidified an A in the class. To this day, I still believe that about our choices. Sometimes I have done great with my choices and sometimes I make mistakes. Today I vow to start making more choices that will positively affect change in my life and in the lives around me. Here goes:

Me - I will set goals that are achievable. One on my biggest challenges is that I love large scale projects.  If I coordinate meals for a family who is grieving a lost one, I automatically start to think about establishing a network of food sharing across the community. If I coordinate an event at my children's school, I want to make it the biggest and best event possible, even though I do not have the volunteer power to do it. So, I challenge myself, to be realistic in my goal setting so that I have more down time to spend with my family.

Children - Since I will have so much more time available due to my realistic expectations, I will be able to work with them on setting their goals. They are 15 and 12 so they should be thinking about what outcomes they want for their lives. Don't get me wrong, we have discussed this many times before. But, we don't have it written out on paper - something tangible for them to refer to. I have learned over the years, that it is so important to get things in writing. Nothing compares to having a visual reminder of what your goals are. It can be something as simple as a spiral notebook that you write your goals in. As you achieve them, check them off.  As you think of more goals, add them.  If you have one main goal, tape it to the wall. If you want to make it pretty, frame it. If you don't have a frame, make a paper frame or tear the edges of the paper to make it look artsy and tape that up. Whatever you need to do so that you see your goal and love your goal, do it. That is what I will be working on for my boys and myself.

Marriage - I will schedule a date night every other week. See how my realistic goals just kicked in. I originally wrote every week, but then realized that goal was definitely setting me up for failure. We are always so busy with our children's activities that we just can't make that commitment right now. In a few months that should change. So, for now, it's every other week.  By March, it will be every week.  And hey, if I think of swim meets, football and hockey games as potential date locations, then I can pretend that we have date night much more frequently.  Wait...stop right there!  That's a joke, when I say date night, I mean date night with just my fantastic husband. I want an occasional dinner out with just the two of us, and nice long walks around the lake in the evening, walking hand in hand and staring into each other's eyes, and it should be after the lights go on to illuminate the bridge over the lake, sparkling on the water, and rippling on the waves.  (Harlequin romace, here I come. lol.)

Health - I am completely outing my self as being a bit overweight here.  Oh the trauma.  Fine, I am over it.  After all, anyone who sees me can see that there is plenty of me to love.  A part of that is due to some injuries that I have had from playing hockey and, truth be told, some injuries are from walking on flat ground.  Let's just say that I have never been known for my graceful ballerina-like movements.  Today I vow to do my physical therapy exercises more frequently, get into the pool at least 2 times a week and lift weights twice a week as well.  See, realistic expectations.  The pool will start as soon as my bronchitis clears up.  I will do the rest starting today.  I think that I am going to consider any workouts my hubby and I do together as date nights.  I am gong to think out of the box for a bit.  I still want my dinner and walk though...

Home & Environment - I will also continue my journey to eliminate chemicals in my home and the environment.  What made me decide on this journey was for me to really start reading the labels of some of the cleaners that I was using. It kicked me in the pants and made me decide that I was not willing to risk my family's health. In part it was me being selfish. I want to be around for a really long time and I want that time to be healthy. I want to be the Grandma (Bueli and Bacia, as the boys call my Mom and Joe's Mom) who is healthy and energetic enough to play tennis, go on bike rides, do a mini triathalon with everyone, and clown around with my Grand Children. (sidebar - I know that those relationship titles are not technically capitalized, but I have always chosen to capitalize them because I believe that the relationships are so important to me, that they deserve a capital letter.)  I believe that if I slowly cut out the toxins in our home and environment, that I will be that Bueli down the road.  I already switched to microfiber cleaning and cut out window and stove/oven cleaner.  The bottle of bleach that I have is about 2 years old as well, and still pretty full.

There are so many studies that show the negative affects of chemicals - from burns, to repiratory issues, to cancer links.  It just makes sense to continue on that journey.  I know, some of you are saying - well there is no conclusive proof that chemical X leads to cancer.   I say, you may be right, but there are so many studies that show a potential correlation between chemicals and illnesses.  We even have a national chemical poisoning hotline because there are so many toxic products on the market.  Here is the number in case you don't have it programmed in your phone yet. 800-222-1212.  Using less chemicals just makes sense to me.  I am sure that I am not the only person out there who used to do what I like to call the "Spray and Run".  My sinuses, throaght and eyes used to get so irritated when using cleaning products that I sprayed and ran, hoping that the chemicals in the air would disperse so that I could breathe.  I even almost bought one of those fancy chemical masks.  I encourage you to take a few minutes to take a look at the labels on your cleaning products and your personal care products such as shampoo and moisturizer.  Researh why "gentle" shampoo for babies is "gentle".  I read somewhere that in one product it was because of an added chemical that desnsitized the baby.  Oh...so the shampoo isn't really gentle, it just has an extra chemical to dull the senses that makes us think it is...?  How long does that piece of furniture really have to stay wet with the chemicals on those cleaning wipes and spays for it to actually be sanitized?  I can't imagine that many of us keep them wet for even just 5 minutes, let alone the length of time the products indicate.  How does that affect germ resistance?  Yes, I am the mother who refuses to send the antibacterial wipes to school.  I choose to not contribute to the problem.  Let's just clean the tables with water and a cloth.  If my kids get sick once a year from germs that they picked up at school, so be it.  It will just make their immune system stronger.  I like to think of my immune system as a muscle.  The more I make it work, the stronger it gets.  I know it is not the case for all illnesses, but I think that is a safer bet for me than using all of those toic chemicals.  Again, it is all about choices.  So, please take a look at labels, look online for the Material Safety Data Sheets (MSDSs) for the products in your home, even for products that are supposed to be "green", and take a look at the Environmental Working Group's "Hall of Shame" that talks about cleaning products.

I could go on and on, but I'll stop here.  My next post will include some info about some alternatives to harsh chemicals in personal care and cleaning.  I am fortunate to have joined a great company as an independent consultant, which is also what prompted me to start doing my research on chemicals.  I get to meet some fantastic people while hosting presentations and showcasing fantastic products that you can use to save time and money, all while eliminating a majority of the toxic chemicals in your home.  For me, a job can't get any better than that!  We all know that I love speaking in front of a group, see the paragraph above about my speech class.  I hope that everyone reads the next post, but I am separating it so that you can easily choose to skip it if you want.  No pressure from me to read what you are not interested in after all.

Go enjoy your day and think about your goals!

In the Beginning...

Thank you so much for reading my very first post.  I hope that each and every one of my posts positively affects change in us all.  I decided to start blogging because I tend to think that I am usually right and that I have something valuable to say.  And by usually, I mean always.  LOL.   But...when I think about life, and how much I have learned and changed over the years, I have to admit that maybe I have not always been right all of the time.  I have learned so much from my family, children, friends, people who I have spent hours volunteering with, co-workers, and even from people who have almost driven me crazy with the things that they do.  To be honest, I have learned A LOT from that last group - A lot of what not to do.  Throughout my learning process, there has always been one underlying theme that has always crept up in almost everything.  It Takes a Village to do all things well.  From cooking dinner to raising our children, there is no way that we can truly be successful without the help of others.  We do not necessarily see the help that we are getting, but trust me, it has definitely been there.  We just need to open our eyes and our hearts to it.  I truly believe that when this happens and when we acknowledge the help that we receive from others, and acknowledge how we help others on a daily basis, that our world will become a better place.

I know, I know...I can hear it now - "I cook dinner all by myself; I am a single parent raising my children all alone; I work out of my home with no one around...

All of those may seem like things that we are doing alone, but they really are not.

The food that you are cooking came from somewhere.  The grocery store, farmer's market, or maybe you grew some of it yourself.  There are so many people involved in getting that food to your home and eventually to your plate, from the person who sells the seeds, the person who tills the ground that the food is planted in, the person driving the truck to get it to the grocery store, to the cashier, and yes, finally you.

I know that raising a child as a single parent has significant challenges and I wish everyone who faces those challenges the very best.  My sister did it for a while and I saw some of what she went through so I know that things can be difficult.  Although she was alone as a parent, she really did have a support system behind the scenes.  Her children went to school, they read books, played sports and instruments and wrote stories. Every one of those activities involved so many people at different stages, people who I am thankful for.

I too have worked out of my home all alone and I know that it can be both a challenge and a blessing, but I definitely did not do it all by myself.  Without the people who built my home, put together my furniture, installed my internet service and sewed my pillow top mattress where I work occasionally, I would not have been able to enjoy life as much.

So yes, it takes a village even to have a simple meal.  If we truly accept that and appreciate what it means in our lives, then maybe everyone will start treating each other with greater kindness and respect.  One of the things I often talk to my friends about is the idea of everyone just being nice to one another.  If we all treat each other well then things will start changing for the better in our lives and hopefully some of the chaos in the world will go away.

From one Village Member to another...Thank You for all that you have done for me, both directly and indirectly.